Trials Are Important

Trials are hard, but the one thing I learned is that God has used trials in my life to make me stronger.

 

Looking back on the hardest years of my life, it started when I was in my sophomore year of High School. My youth pastor and there family was moving away to become full time missionaries. I felt the first sting of change really take place in my life. They were my inspiration and encouragement, God used them in my life to teach me how important a relationship with Christ is. When I looked at John and Lisa (my youth pastor and his wife) I could see something in them that was so beautiful. They were truly on fire for God and had a whole hearted passion to serve Him. At that point in my life I wanted to be selfish and keep them in Utah, but God had a different plan.

 

From the moment they left it seemed everything in my life began falling apart. No longer did we have the strong youth group we had before. In fact the whole church seemed different without them. A bunch of people left the church and I felt like I was a stranger in my home church that I had been going to since I was eight years old. My best friend and I all of the sudden weren’t friends anymore, and I began asking God why He was doing this to me. I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t have friends at church. I didn’t get this trial that God was putting me through. It hurt so much to go to church and feel like an outcast like I didn’t belong there.

 

When I didn’t think anything could get worse it did. My senior year of High School I had friends at school but they were more distant than I had ever felt. Now I was really getting mad at God. I remember crying myself to sleep nearly every night. Why wasn’t God hearing my prayers? Why did it seem that He didn’t care? Now I not only had any friends at church I was alone at school as well. Through this time I felt so many emotions. I felt lonely, sad, mad, like a loser, and I was really feeling sorry for myself.

 

Now I was on to my first year of college I believe it was spring semester. Still I felt extremely lonely. I wanted friends so much; I was tired of being sad and depressed. I just wanted a friend. I remember one day I went in my room, closed the door and got my Bible out and began reading. I felt I had so much going on inside me that I couldn’t focus on God’s word so I stopped and just began crying out to God. I thanked Him for being the only one in my life that was consistently there for me. At that moment I realized that people will always come in and out of your life, but God never left me. He was there for me to talk to, rely on, and He saw every tear that I cried throughout those past years. He was there! A huge lesson that I learned was that God is truly all I need. I remember praying to Him. I was fully surrendering my selfish desires of wanting friends, and from that point on I would be okay with Him being my best friend.

The following summer God truly blessed me with a big group of Christian friends. I never could have imagined that God would have given me friends at church. This changed how I believe in so many ways. When I would ask God for friends I was excepting say one or two, but He blew my mind and gave me a huge group. I am truly in awe of how faithful our God is. Although I had to go through a long tear filled, lonely process of waiting on God it was worth it. I praise God for the trial that He put me through.